Reporting to the children's Aid Society

Damn eh...This abuse stuff is kinda of tricky...You remember the events and the emotions and even the smells of his after shave the feel of his hot breath as he breaths heavily on you neck..The same intense emotion felt that day is relieved again...These flashbacks really suck....Anyway I in my raw emotional flash back state contacted the children's aid society with such urgency as if they somehow could reach back in time and fix the situation. I feel a bit foolish. I hope Melanie at CAS would excuse my ramblings. I even took out of the library a couple of books on child survivors of abuse, One book, Boys don't cry, and another Gardens of Shame...I even got so despaired that no one was doing anything that I thought maybe I hadn't reported the people involved correctly I e-mailed Cathy Vine the author who wrote Gardens of Shame and she even did my the honor of visiting my blog. She did give me useful information on how to report the abuses I went through drawing on her main subject character Martin in her book. She said that the way I should introduce the issues and events should be the same as Martin where he gathered his paperwork and just reported the incidents to the police..in a simplified manner..not as a diary as I have done here...I thought since I was under the care of the CAS at the time..they would just take up the cause and represent me in this whole matter...I guess thats not how it works eh...? One thing I did get out of the books is the person who exposed the Christian brothers of sexual abuse said all he got for his troubles was to see a couple of old priests get sentenced for a couple of years and the settlement was extremely small and even that he had to fight for including the medical support he needed that he again had to fight for...Mcann said if he had the option of doing it over again ..he wouldn't have reported the abuse..And as for Martin Kruze he jumped to his death off a bridge 2 weeks after his moleslester confessed to his abuses in court. I guess I should go back to why I am writing these memories down...I for one want to dump them out of my mind...and also reading that the two Kennedy house staff social workers sexual abused 2 kids at their uxbridge home..It brought out guilt that if I had of made more of an effort instead of just contacting Edward who had alot to lose if he followed up on my allegations at the time as he was building the largest empire of youth services houses but instead , ED just sweeped them under the carpet and didn't report the crimes, kinda of reminds of you of Star Trek-where Spock says "the needs of the many don't outweigh the needs of the one" lol or something like that..Oh yeah back to hearing about the 2 kids who got abused at the uxbridge home...that got me mad that somehow it might be my fault these kids got abused then it got me to thinking about all those kids who were further abused by John, Kathy, Doug, Mrs. Sheppard...and on ...and on...My abusers are not old men yet , and if I don't press charges then they could be working still in the child care profession and further abusing kids..I don't want that to happen..as I would really be mad at myself...I did give all the full names to the children's Aid Society so if they were working in the child care industry it would now fall upon CAS as guilty as I redflagged them as risks...Can I wash my hands of all this and now focus on my life again..? As to EDWARD he pissed me off so much by not reporting them that I even sent him an E-mail, and a link to this blog so he could read about how much harm the people under him were doing...Anyway I am tired...

Algonquin park--end.?

Well someone had the bright idea that I and another guy..Scott who was about as country boy as I was..he was even more of a city feller..and One of the male staff members should go on a hike sleep over into the interior of Algonquin...Why would I want to do that I questioned? Well it was more an Now I am informed that the hike was happening..and get packed as we leave in one hour..SHIT...Shit..shit...We each had a hiking backpack ..damn it was loaded..what the hell man..we even had to bring toilet paper..damn..Well lets not forget the deet..nothing like the sweet taste of deet..but it's one of those don't leave your campsite without it essentials. So we first had to get a drive to even get to this hiking trail...We had to hurry as no street lights..in fact no lights..and no one brings the bag of firewood around either..we had to scurry in the forest--yup the bears area to get firewood...ok so the race is on...Scott is a nice guy...but he is your basic stoner...he would rather just walk ten minutes and say ...man lets set up here....MAN...I was inclined to agree with him....better yet I finally said it...I want to go back to the main camp..I want to go back to the main camp....I want to go back to the main camp....shoot I guess that only works when you are wearing the little red shoes and carry totol...anyway Slick the staff that came with us..said come on quit clowning around ...lets go...oh man we hiked...for hours..damn what the hell does anyone see in this...as I slap at another mosquito ..shoot he got away..next thing he is going to let all his buddies know where he obtained the blood and then I will pay the price for not smacking myself sooner...ok..how far are we going...Slick said till we get to the end of the trail.....I said why do we have to get to the end...he said because then we can say we made it to the end...Weeeee...damn who cares...Scott is now starting to lag behind..he wants to transfer some canned goods to me as he thinks his pack is lighter...after blowing off tension and swearing at each other for a minute or two....he says hey hold up...and he shows me a big fat joint...I laugh how are you going to smoke that...? He said thats where I can in..keep Slick busy once we make camp and then I will say I want to go down to the lake..you chat Slick up...how about it..Bob? I said well my pack is rather heavy ...he said prick..as he grabbed the heavy cast iron pan..and the two rolls of toilet paper...how that...well ...I am sure it could be lighter..he said ahh..screw you..as I thought hey maybe they were right..going hiking brings the hikers together..Now that we had a plan..time seemed to go a little faster-lol well maybe it was because my pack was 10lbs lighter...Well we made it...the end of the trail...it ended at a river...Well I asked Slick whats the difference between this river and the river at the main camp in Whitefish? ---Come-on why do you try and ruin everything...Scott saw this as his que to slip away...I led Slick into a conversation asking about how he liked the hiking trip and this opened the door to him telling me about how he bonded with his dad on a hiking trip....and how he hoped that we also could take away some great memories from the trip...damn Scott where are you..he is almost finished his one on one "moment" with me...I scan the point where Scott entered into the forest and he was carrying some wood back...I said well? He said this hide away place has more campers past the big rock over there..they were also looking for wood...he said he couldn't spark up they were almost pulling the wood from out of his arms..So Scott is given the hatchet to chop the wood...he is slinging the hatchet with as much interest or care...Slick was trying to motivate him..telling him that we are all set up and tied the food up a tree..now the bears can't reach it...nice fire going..all deeted up..what could else could we want..Scott says a nice cold beer would be nice...we all looked at each other..and grumbled yeah..that would then be a great molson minute...Well Scott is slugging the axe just like Slick showed him...but he is sitting down swinging it..with the wood being held between his feet...he is chopping his V cut swinging ...chopping on an angle left then right..Slick says ok now put more force into..Scott says ok I will do this one..then you do the rest...this is tiring..I just want to go into the tent and go to sleep..maybe this is just a dream and I will wake up in my bed..We all laughed at Scott...he was laughing as he was serious...smack ....smack...smush...OOOOOO..HOLY SHIT....he screamed so loud that the birds all took off all around us...magnifing his screaming...what..Scott ..what..hap...oh shit..oh shit...hey slick ....its deep man..because he was chopping on an angle..it went in and ricocheted off his bone and carried on...chewing its way through a big hunk of flesh...damn..thats deep..what do we do now>? Well we can't go back now as the trail is dark...we have to camp tonight and leave tomorrow...Scott said what do you mean man...I am in f..king pain here...Well Slick breaks out the med kit...it has aspirins...he said...big deal..Scott says as he slips them down ...Slick said its a clean wound...it should only need a couple of stitches....now to get out of here...Slick looks around as if he missed something....ahh. he reaches behind a rock...I saw this stick here...and it has a nice arm pit y in the branch...he takes the hatchet and knocks off the little branches...there he says..as if he was measuring for a hockey stick..he adjusts the height..again..hows that..Scott says its good thanks..that should help..So after a couple of hours the pain really starts to get bad...Slick even went over to the other campers and they only had a med kit...but no pain relievers..Shit Scott...why don't you spark up the joint...he mentions that it would be good if he could get high it would most likely be enough to get him through the night...Slick was starting to catch on...well ...now everyone was talking in circles..now if say you did have some pot...and you did smoke it...say if you lite it up while I was in the bush getting firewood..then I would never know..and you would be able to sleep tonight in some comfort..now thats only if you did have pot which we all know you don't...damn this is good..Slick is giving you the ok to smoke up..and he won't bust ya...shit Slick is a cool guy after all eh..Scott...just then Slick says to me..you didn't cut you leg...no reason for you to partake...lol...well we will be getting more firewood..see ya in five ok..don't smoke it all as you might need a hit in the morning...Scott say the hell with that...he was in so much pain..he just wanted to pass out....We went through the motions of picking up wood..as the air was filled with the unmistakably aroma of weed...finally Scott stopped coughing..thats was as good as clue as any he finished the joint...we went back to the fire...Slick asked how he was now..he said good ..thanks alot man...For what Slick says..lol....Morning comes and Scott is all ready for the trip back ...well at least he is up hopping on his home made crutch..getting the feel for it...Slick is loading the packs up...he is taking all the stuff out of the two leaving just a couple of things in each..but the third pack was FULL..ok lets go..I reach for one of the light packs he says what are you doing..you get the full pack as he had to Help Scott So my job was to be the camel on this hike back...what the hell...I said as he put the pack on me...this is heavier then me...Holly shit..Slick was now sticking more stuff on..clipping this and that to everything...I had to lean forward almost doubling over just to keep from falling backwards...I said I don't think I can carry this..as I made two steps and and the skillet was banging against the 3 metal cups ..well at least I wouldn't get lost in the morning fog...ok lets roll..man the going was slow...poor Scott was really starting to hurt...Slick took off Scotts pack and added it to his own...Hey I said why don't I get rid of half of this stuff..let Scott take half and I can walk/run ahead and hike back to Whitefish and get someone to pick ya up...Slick liked the idea minus the transfer of stuff....he said yeah..go .... go....Scott now also chanted come on...man go already...as if just saying it many times over would have pushed me further ahead..ok ..I will go as fast as I can.. with that I headed out...damn finally reached the road...walked along the road..and this car pulled over and opened the door...hi..two girls were inside..you want a ride...I said sure ..thanks..I told them about our hike and they said oh really we didn't see anyway walking the road...I said that they we traveling slow so they must have reached the road yet...damn the car ride made the time to whitefish in no time..they dropped me off..so I just had to walk down the road and I would be back at camp...damn..who would have ever thought I would be happy to see the camp again...damn my pack was starting to pop stuff off .. I picked up the skillet..cups...can of food..now cradled in my arms..I tried to hold the pack together..not enough hands...shit..they were all sitting on the picnic table...move I said..move...I make it to the table and the pack just bursts apart..happy that I made it...Kathy blows my bubble..why the heck did you throw all the stuff all over the place pick up it up...I said hey I am lucky that it held out this long...Oh so dramatic..all the time so dramatic--why are you here? Well good to see you all too...Scott cut himself with the hatchet and we had to cut the hike short...thanks god...bull..kathy said ..where are they..I said you have to go meet them and get Scott to the hospital for stitches..ahhh. more dramatics..what stories you come up with...Bobby..what the hell.. lets go get them...shit now I am begging someone to save them...finally Kathy says ok..when we pick them up and Scott is ok..you will be on restriction forever..We are tired of your lies...whatever I said..come on you are coming with me...If I have to make this trip you do also..look I said ..I am tired from hiking back double time...just head down the road...you might catch them walking...nope you are coming..get in...and off we go..we past where I imaged them to be by now...all the way back to the place where we entered the trail we found them...now it was Slicks turn to yell at me..what the hell took you so long..I explained to him that kathy didn't believe me about Scott..so she was in no hurry...ya whatever...boy--this was one of those times you just can't win for trying..They drove back to the camp..cleaned up the cut..and rebandaged it up..gave Scott more aspirins and off to the hospital...I went into my tent and read..damn it felt good to be back..as I hit the play button on my tape deck...yup good to be back..as I drifted off..the time dragged on...finally going home...as we packed up the car....well so I thought...

Algonquin Park part 5

Well the bears came in the middle of the night, I was awoken by the cans and pots and pans banging together, I froze...to hell with getting out of the tent...screw that...I hid under the covers...the frigging bear sniffed at my tent...I could smell his stench it smelt like a dirty dog that got wet...the only thing that separated me and the bear was the thin nylon tent...Well I guess everyone else felt the same as I because no one sounded the and started banging their noise makers...you could hear the bear ripping at the tent..going through the foodsupplies...ok I didn't wet my sleeping bag...but I had to remind myself to keep breathing as I held my breath for fear that the bear would hear my teeth knattering together..Finally it was quiet...now someone banged their pots...I as well did..and followed by screams...I think everyone was screaming and yelling ---more of a release then a scare tactic I am sure...Damn camping sucks...The park ranger came by the next day and said that they will set the trap again..but it wasn't the same bear..it was another..but no worry as they knew also who it was...He said best if you confront the bear just let it do what it wants and we were correct in not scaring the bear as the last thing you would want would be a frightened bear. All the food was transferred to the station wagon...as per rangers orders..gee are we ever happy campers..:(

Algonquin Park part 4

I was walking with Chris one of the guys and we came across a van in a camp site...two nice looking chicks were cooking. Chris said hi.. they waved hello...so he went to talk to them...He asked them what was going on and stuff., it appeared that they arrived early as they were booked for a site tomorrow, but got away early so they were told that there was no room at the regular site so they were told they could camp here for half price for the one day..till their site become available...So that is how they ended up at the group camp site...so Chris uses his charm and thirst for alcohol or drugs and comes right out and asks them if they could spare some stash as he would pay them for their troubles..they look at each other and say ..well now looks as if we have some partyers here after all...she said come into the van..we will see what we can do for ya....Nice van Chris went on...and it truely was...a real camper van...he sat at the table while I took a spot on the floor by the door....So she says they havn't been to the beer store yet, but had some hash....Chris said great..any chance of selling a bit...sure Liz said as she introduced her self...and this is Jane..we are kinda of what you would call adventure girls looking for a good time ourselves...how about coming by tonight and get to know each other...Chris explained that they we were not here by ourselves we had were from a boys group home so that was our story...so you see we can't just pop in and out at all hours of the night..Liz says a boys home how old are you guys...I said old enough....she laughed and said I bet you guys are still virgins....I said yeah we could teach you guys a few tricks eh Chris...he was silent...As if she guessed right they both laughed and said as if we had left the van ...discussed how it would be great to break two virgins in....they said we would remember them for the rest of our lives...sounds pretty neat...what do you think...I said ....I don't think so...Chris says hold on now..I might be interested in this....we talked for a bit and they allowed Chris to roll the hash joint in the van....How about we get started now Jane says..winking at Chris....spark it up and lets have some fun...He said we would have to stick to the orginal plan...of coming over later that eveing....We met the rest of the guys and they went for a walk in the woods to smoke the hash...I didn't want any so I stood back as they passed around the joint..As if they didn't have enough Chris broke into his stash he was slowly going to piece meal out for the next week and stuck the chuck of hash onto a pin and stuck the pin into a tree...now he lite the hash and then everyone took turns sucking on the hash til it was all gone...oh well Chris said...it was a good plan to save it ...but right now I don't care...I followed them ..I guess I was the babysitter for the drugies....we didn't do anything just kinda got lost in the woods and eatin up by mosquitoes...That night I thought I heard a bear around my tent...grabbing my pot and untensil I was ready to make some noise...but it was Chris...hey man he whispered ....you coming ..? Naw I said ...See ya in bit eh...the next morning Chris comes walking down the road and someone says hey when did you get up...he said he just did and went to the washroom...really...they didn't believe him..they tried to pump Chris but he stuck by his story....finally they laid off of him...I went up to him...and said funny you don't look any different...He laughed and said nope..I may not but I had the best time of my life....One I shall never forget...you really should have come...because I sure did...we laughed....well maybe next time I assured Chris...

Algonquin Park--continued part 3

Well more fun to come--its getting night time..this is the mosquitoes time to carry on with the sucking of blood--now I know where the Idea of vanpires came from...it must have orginated in a place like this...all kinds of creatures that sucked blood..So as the sun went down the deet was pulled out..splash it on...quickly as they seemed to be very agressive mosquitoes..no matter how hard you try the damn deet always seemed to get into your mouth...yuk what a taste....As we sat around the camp fire trying to stay warm..we see and hear people screaming running towards our camp site...ok what the hell man..now some of the kids are crying --finally one of the kids seemed to have caught there breath and screamed a BEAR......A BEAR...!! Kathy again said ok...enough...people...one of the people in charge said sorry but their camp site was being attacked by a bear...They asked if they could stay here for a bit till the bear left...Kathy said why don't you drive up and get the provincial park police...running into people's private camp sites isn't really an option...whatever...I thought...One of the other staff said maybe if we all went down to the camp site and made a whole bunch of noise it would scare the bear away....so we grabbed whatever we could clank together to generate noise and headed down to their site....the little kid beside me was hitting the pot lid so hard that they broke one of our steel ladels..on the pot lid....Kathy also saw the kid snap the untensil and said this will not do....I said lay off eh..as the kid also wet their pants out of fright..damn this is one scared kid...I said hey kid hows it going, he came down a bit..and said through sobs that the bear was no further from him then I....he cryed that he wanted to go home...and then started hitting the lid with the broken utensil again..screaming I want to go home..over and over again....We arrived at the camp...one of their staff jumped in the car and headed out to get the provincial park police...The place was a mess.......the damn bears got into everything...they built the fire high..hoping that the fire would also aid in keeping the bear away ....well one good thing came out of all this...the older girls got our attention...They were from Hamilton...One of the girls ..who was a real cutie grabbed me and hid behind me whenever she thought she heard something or saw something in the bush..the police finally arrived..They also had in tow a huge steel cylinder that was a bear trap...they said they knew who the bear was...she had done this before...they catch her and then ship her into the wild further up north...she made her way back down south rather fast this time..but not to worry they set the trap up...they baited the trap with this greasy hunk of meat that stunk....they placed the meat at the end of the trap the bear enters it..pulls on the meat sending the huge steel door closed...Well those girls from Hamilton worked fast as Susan gave me a kiss and said see ya tomorrow..and thanked me for coming down and helping out..as if I alone saved the day.......The next day.....We awoke to the men around the trap securing it...yup they caught the bear....wow that was quick...and away they go...they just hooked up the trap and drove away with the bear. So due to their site being attacked they had shorten their stay...so they were to be leaving soon...they had a structure there...so they had planned activities...so I didn't see Susan till night time...We all just stood around talking and stuff and talking about the bear...exchanged phone numbers...got another kiss and they hoped to see us in the morning. We secured our food tent with stakes and attached string to the posts and on the string hung every pop can and pie plates and pots and pans....it doubled as our drying rack for the dishes and our warning system for the food tent...upon hearing the pots and cans we were all to run out of our tents screaming and yelling..hitting the pots and lids together thus scaring the bear away....That night I couldn't sleep well..damn bears...anyway...due to the hystrically excitement I got a miagrine...I arose early morning and went over to the central swimming area...it was quiet and their was a mist on the water still..I could hear the loons talking back and forth...now if only this miagraine would go away.....shit my eye site started go...so I just closed my eyes and felt the calm quiet...only to be broken by the girls from Hamilton..shit not now....I tried to explain that I had a headache that interfered with my eye site...but they couldn't grasp that...so just as I was explaining I couldn't see clearly I look down at one of the girls and she has this bikini top on..and her breast is poking out and her nipple is showing...oh damn what a time to be in a full blown miagraine...Shit no matter how I willed my eye site to return..it wouldn't as I stared at the naked flesh as it apperared like a piscal painting....damn and as soon as my eye site returned Susan saw my gaze and smacked the girl and told her to put it away....damn eh...anyway they were on their way and just stopped by to say goodbye...she kissed me goodbye and said she would write...and she did...a couple of times..

Algonquin Park--continued

Yuk..why the hell would God ever create leeches..it was almost as bad as all the frigging mosquitoes that keep us in the tents by nightfall..As if that wasn't bad enough I learnt that even the flies bite...black frigging flies...oh damn I now new how the lady on green acres must have felt...give me Toronto anytime...Well meanwhile back in the canoe we were heading back to the camp site, well so we thought....Till we came to a deep end..and got stuck again...I said I am not getting out of this frigging canoe into that leech infested water again....so we all took the paddles and grabbed the tree branches to get free...it took more effort but at least we didn't have to venture into the water again....finally on our way again...I felt some dirt ineptness my big toe and my other toe..so I brushed the guck away..it was stuck on..shit..I thought I will have to find some showers around here...so after another wrong turn...the guck seemed to be collecting dirt as it was getting bigger...what the hell..I thought...I stopped paddling and put my feet up on the cross members of the canoe with the intent to get this scumy dirt out from inbetween my toes...DAMN.....DAMN...I SCREAMED...DAMN...the bulge between my toes was another leech..it was getting fatter feeding off my blood...How the hell do I pull this thing off.. it was stuck on like glue..and everytime I pulled it would settle in deeper...was this a joke or something...the guys in the canoe were now laughing as they watched me struggle and have an one on one fight of tug of war with this damn leech...I yelled what the frig are you guys laughing at...get this thing off of me...and the more I got all freaked out..the more they laughed..til I also joined in laughing.not out of humor but out of hysteria..but stopped short as we nearned the camp..and yelled at the guy steering to get us in without getting caught in the weeds again..and again...now seeing that I was almost ashore...I was getting really hyper as this alien was sucking the life out of me...I knew that He had to go as we approached the camp..Kathy was yelling at us for not having our life jackets on..damn she was correct but she sure was forward for being a student observer..she even snitched on us..and keep harping about the fact tha we didn't have life jackets on..I said excuse me but I have a more pressing concern right now...., I informed her of the leech..and she said so what ..don't be so dramatic it wasn't going to kill ya..well easy to say when its not on your foot...We tried to pour salt on it...it moved but didn't let go...so one of the guys lite a match and then blew it out..and touched it to the creature..oh that worked..it moved more..so I grabbed the pack of matches now that I knew I had him...I keep touching the leech..after three matches he finally let go....one of the guys stepped on it..and it spewed out all red...thats my blood you son of a bitch....as I grabbed my shoes and proceeded to get the living blood out of the leech...Once the leech was mixed into the soil with nothing left 0f it....Kathy was still rating us out to the staff...she said that we should be put on camp restriction..I said yeah whatever..as if I am going out into the scumy river infected water again...The only one activity and now the canoe stood dry..as no one wanted to go out in the canoe just to get stuck in the weeds...oh and of course no one went swimming in the river again either..oh boy what fun we were having.....

Algonquin Park

While back we go to Algonquin Park...We arrived at Whitefish camping grounds this was the group camping grounds. They seperated the family camping from the groups, but they opened the group camping grounds to regular camping when the family grounds got filled up....We set up the camping gear..All stuff had to be emptied out of the "house car" as it was to be driven back to Toronto..so it was dumped..We went about setting up the tents--and even had a food tent. I was to room with the other guys in this tent that already was way to crowded. One of the staff brought along a little pup-tent that he said I could borrow, on the condition that I didn't smoke in the tent or bring any food in the tent as the bears would rip it apart to get at the food...well I assured him that I would not....he allowed me to set the tent up...I brought along my cassette tape recorder and he even lent me tapes that he recorded that were hit tunes...still on the chum charts..cool..I was all set..We had a very good spot..right on river..we had a canoe that was attached to the "house stationwagon" that was put by the river, and yes the rules were that we had to have life jackets for everyone that went into the canoe..So all was done...now what...hmm....now what...hmm now what....damn first time camping and it was so dang boring..We were told that we were to go play...play..play what..where? There was no structure at the camp. They said well go canoeing...We three of us the next day set out on a canoe outing..the damn river was full of weeds and trees and there branches..we kept getting stuck...so one of us would have to get out and jump in the water to pull us free...after getting stuck so many times the adventure got stale --but quick...oh damn we got stuck again...This time it was my turn to pull us free...I jumped in and pushed the canoe free...steered the canoe down another path...hey btw anyone know where the hell the camp site was....hmm, a new problem --I think we went down so many feeder rivers and cut offs we were slightly lost...looking for familier sites were started to paddle...and got stuck so often that I just stayed in the water and pulled us free when we got stuck again...whew a familer landmark...so I pulled myself into the canoe and saw this long black mark on my leg...OH SHIT IT WASN'T A PIECE OF RIVER CRAP..IT WAS ALIVE...I saw blood at one end of the thing...one of the guys said its a leech man..pull it off before it fully sets itself into you ....A leech...Shit ...what the hell..why is it attaching itself to me..? He laughed and said thats what they do..they suck your blood...DAMN as I pulled on this thing...it stuck to my leg...I pulled harder it stretched three fold......finally it gave..and I tossed it back into the water..Well thats the last time I go in this water...

Asst. Director got nabbed--he then retired from his position.

Yup..Doug got nabbed so he had to retire from his position. So they hired another winner...A curly hired actor. His claim to fame was he was a professional actor thus he could jump into any part and be an ace at whatever he did..This guy's ego was big--well bigger then his actor career anyway, he stared on some series on tv. He was such a dork...He was chosen to drive the "house stationwagon" to camp..So they decided to load one car with the supplies and drive the kids in the other...There was still not enough seats for everyone so someone had to drive with this "superstar"--No one stepped up to chose to drive with him--but since I was the only one that kinda of knew him from hanging around the Kennedy house office I felt sorry for the "star" and volunteered to drive up to Algonquin park with him and the supplies. As you can guess the ride was about as exciting as this blog..lol..He must have been playing the part as a boring chauffeur..just going through the motions of doing his job. After that Edward guessed that it was a one man show operation....so when this "star" quit to move on and pursue his acting career Ed didn't hire another asst. Director....whatever happened to this "star" who knows he must have made it big on Broadway because he never made it big in Hollywood..LOL

Carol--The secretary.

The first secretary that welcomed me by slapping me left. I don't know how many more they hired, but one that stayed was very pretty and superkind. Her name was Carol, she is married and also a mother of two boys. She is very pretty, yes I did ask her if she was a model. She said that her sister was more of the model in the family, but she did do modeling for sears catologs when she was younger, also to boot she had a knack for new technolgies, she was an operator/model at a trade show for a new super computer...Wow I said how did you know how to operate the super computer..she said that it really isn't that hard, and she had extensive experience on different buisness machines..so it just came to her naturally, she could dance her fingers across the keyboard and hell she didn't even have to look at it..She was the fastest typist and won awards for her skills..I looked around the little office of Kennedy House and wondered why she worked here. She said although the finacial gains were small, she lived just around the corner and the hours were good as she could spend time with her kids without paying for child care. I took to Carol immediately. After school I ventured over to the office and would talk to her as Ed usually took off at 3pm she didn't like being alone in the office as she was terrified of mice..and she saw one climbing up the chinese weave that surrounded her office walls so in turn we welcomed each other's company. As time went by it became routine for me to venture over as soon as I saw the house stationwagon leave the driveway...it always amused me as It was the house station wagon to be used for Kennedy house purposes but We only "borrowed" the car from Edward once when we were driven up to camp and then it was driven back the same day so Ed wouldn't be without a car...anyway I mentioned this to Carol but she didn't comment on that fact...and changed the subject to other things..I guess it was one of the many things that we all knew but couldn't talk about as it was the 'big guy'. Her husband worked for the TTC and worked the eveing shift so he would be home to care for the kids while she worked, so being home at different times did cause some ups and downs in the family, but Carol explained you did what you had to do to survive, and to put the kids first and make sure their interests were looked after and theirs as parents then came second...Wow what a concept. After all it wasn't the kids who brought themselves into the world, she also noted that many of the kids in the house came from difficult backgrounds but most of them she felt that if given the chance would raise above their past and would turn out in the end...Hmm, I thought I lived with these guys., I didn't see the potential in most--I saw them as a product of their enviroment and wouldn't surprise me if they all ended up in the big houses after a couple of years. She always held out for the best in the kids..as she invited the kids who didn't have anywhere to go over to Christmas dinner and she was upset that while over at her house they stoled her kids piggy bank . But even after she was disappointed in the kids who stoled, she still never lost hope. Anyway eventually she would get time when her and her husband scheduled allowed them to go out dancing on a weekend and asked if I would babysit her kids...I said I never looked after kids before...I wouldn't know what to do...She laughed and said they more or less look after themsleves..afterall they weren't babies...Well the first time I babysat her youngest went to the washroom and said ok ---yelling from the bathroom I'm finished..ok, that's nice I thought....sooo? His brother said that I have to go wipe his butt clean...I said the hell with that!! I told the older brother to wipe his younger butt clean...with that he yelled and screamed yuk!! He didn't do that his mom always did that. Shit---I said to the other brother how does your mom wipe his butt...he laughed and said I don't know she just does...Both were laughing as I figured out how to get out of this...I tried to encourage him to do it himself...He laughed as if I just asked him to fly to the moon, as both were about the same chances of happening...damn ..damn...damn...I looked at the dog punchy and well he was going to be no help either...ok...I asked his older brother how should I do this...he laughed again..I said here come with me...so we go in and there is his younger brother hold his butt up in the air....I took some toilet paper and as I wiped said ahh, shit...with that the kids started to laugh as they screamed SHIT..SHIT...SHIT...as they chanted that I swore....I said no I meant to say shoot..Ok here goes...damn..damn..damn..I think I touched some went over the paper...with that I again said SHIT...SHIT..SHIT.. and the kids mocked me in their laughter repeating the swear words again...there I said done...tossing the paper into the toilet...all done as I started to wash my hands....he said hey my mom does it again...I said sorry one wipe is all you get...why don't you have a nice bath..He said ok..as he never had a bath this early....good then...and he jumped into the bath..I laughed and said I am not going to soap you up......I hope you know how to do that...he laughed and said he did....I told Carol of the horrible time I had while babysitting..she said why what happened...and burst out laughing as I recalled the eveing...She said that he knew how to do it...but didn't do a perfect job at it yet....and she always followed up finishing up the chore...She said don't worry next time I babysat she would have him "trained"

Jim--my roommate

Jim went to a catholic school. He was also a jock and a chick magnet. He always had chicks calling him, but none came over--I always thought of course they wouldn't come over they were of a fine upbringing being catholic and all...He worked on Watts restaurant as a bus boy...he had and endless supply of energy always on the go. He met this girl who lived in the valley of Old Kingston Rd. Her family ran the horse stables there..They had paths down there that led through to morningside park...you could learn to ride. Well Jim being well a boy...he said he could ride...so His girlfriend brought out her horse..she said it was a good horse..but it had spirit. She wanted to walk with Jim on the horse while she held the reigns but after a couple of minutes Jim felt confident that he could ride on his own...So he took the reigns and head off in the opposite direction from us...he was doing very well..when all of the sudden the horse broke out into a gallop....His girlfriend yelled to pull back on the reigns ...show the horse that you are in charge of him...all Jim succeed in doing was turning the horse around ..now he was heading straight back to us....the horse was coming fast...you could see its head fighting Jim's commands as the horses head was now tilted at an odd angle....as if looking up at Jim and questioning what the hell are you doing ....the horse turned it's head just in time to see the only frigging telephone pole on the property...it darted left around the pole sending Jim flying off on the right...flumph...he landed with a thud...he landed hard.. He got up and brushed himself off...his girlfriend retrieved the horse and came back and said he did well ..and asked if he wanted to give it another try..he said naw not today..he just stopped by..and had to do some homework, maybe tomorrow he would go riding with her...he pushed me along as I was petting the horse...He said come on we have to go now....with that we walked out of the park and started up the hill....he asked me if his girlfriend was out of eye site..I said yeah..she rode off in the other direction..checking again just to be sure...why I asked...he then collapsed beside the graveyard...rolled on the ground back and forth...moaning oh man..oh man...I am hurting bad...He finally stopped rolling and just lie there...I said you want me to get you some help..he said no..stop talking as he had to use all of his energy to focus on easing the pain....We stayed there for awhile in the graveyard..I walked around looking at the some of the grave stones...man there are some very old head stones here...I noticed that most people were old..very old...80's and 90's....hmm. they might have had a rough day to day life but they sure lasted a long time..as I pictured the battery pink bunny...anyway I laughed at my inside joke wondering if I should share it with Jim and thought not...as I noticed that it was starting to get dark...I no longer wanted to read the grave stones...I said come on Jim we have been here at least an hour...you have to get up..he said ok..I had to help him...he leaned on me as we got to the top of the hill and back onto Kingston rd..somehow we made it home..He crashed right away..damn maybe he had an concussion or something..I think you are suppose to keep them awake...I tried to wake him up ...but he said if I disturb him again...he will throw me just like the horse did to him, if I woke him up again...Damn Jim had the staunchest arm pits...they smelt like ear wax...Jim was one of those guys who had to shower at least two times a day..but looks like he wasn't going to this night oh lucky me.

Smile--I am a paid Polaroid camera man

I got this camera that was an instant Polaroid camera. I bought some film and took some pictures..Holy shit the film was about $11 bucks, for instant it took some pretty good quality pics...Lloyd, yup the same guy who wanted to slice my throat...He had this habit of sitting at the table and while in conversation with anyone would look down at his arm and flex his muscle..he then like the A535 guy start twitching his muscle as if he just newly discovered he could make his upper arm move...He was so lost into himself you could have been saying anything and he just tuned you out just like that as he got so engrossed he just stood up and walked out to go to the bathroom room and start flexing his muscles in the mirror--with the door open...Anyway he saw some of the pics I took and saw that they weren't blurry--so he said that he would pay me to take pics of him..$11 for the film and another $11 for my time...Wow my first gig as a photographer. So everyone heard about it and wanted to watch the shoot..I loaded the camera and he would pose and I took the pictures...Well into the fifth pic he started to show more skin...he became the director of the shoot and even added the other guys into helping by holding a lamp he took the shade off of to get more light on himself so there wouldn't be any dark areas in the pics. Near the end of the cartridge he started to show some moon shots...Yuck I said what are you doing...he said what the hell I am paying you...its my dime...just shoot the pics...or give him all of his money back...I said what the hell man...I already shot over half already...So he got all of the guys to also agree that I was paid to take the pics.. and were also saying that I should just do the job he paid me to do...ohhh., all right...so he now had his helpers to get in the shots...he was now nude and he had one guy holding a hockey stick supporting his balls...with the other guy crossing the stick right at his winky blocking it out of the pic...He called the shot high sticking.......He then wanted to get a blue angel on film...so He counted down as one of the guys held the lighter to his ass....I was to shot when he got to three...wow I said you can fart on command...he said he could..so without any rehearsals he posed and counted down on three..He let one go....click...I got it...he then started to burn his ass hairs were on fire..one of the stage hands started smacking his butt with a shirt...what a hoot...one of the other stage hands said they should piss on him to put out the fire...well finally I was out of film....I said ..well thats it..I am no longer in the photography business....I don't care how much he paid me...this was too much artsy for me....With that I put away my camera...and spent the $11 bucks....lol oh yeah..the pics got taken away by the staff ...they called it child porn....and destroyed them...well so they say they destroyed them...

Bob--the staff

Bob was introduced as the new staff . He was overweight and looked like an Ex-cop he smoked at least two packs a shift. He was as sharp as a cop also...He was in tune of when something was up...and seemed to know just where to look to find where the beer was hidden or where one of the guys stashed his drugs. He was also hip with what was up with Kathy--He was one of the first who saw how Kathy bullied the kids around...he questioned her on her decisions...he suggested other ways to punish the kids instead of making them lose face in front of their peers..He treated the guys very well--and in turn gained the respect of the guys....Kathy didn't like the new turn around of the house. She didn't like the way the guys started questioning her intentions...her "because I said so" were not washing anymore...Bob just keep telling us all to question everyone...ask why someone is pushing you into a corner...try to figure out their intentions..Make them accountable for their actions...but in turn you also have to be accountable for your actions. Treat people the way you want to be treated...but he added don't be a dick ..If Kathy says to do your chores and you ask her why..then you are being a dick and she will then have a reason to belittle you..don't give her a reason...Damn Kathy was sure getting pissed as everyone was good when Bob came on shift and she hadn't put any taken away anyone's allowance..btw where did that money go--when their allowance was taken away?--hmm-well anyway...The other staff sensed that Kathy was losing her grip and also jumped on the treat the kids like human wagon..The atmostphere started to clear...and everyone seemed to be getting a little happier...well except for Kathy..lol...This was about the same time as the Childrens aid society put in an undercover social worker---He was a tall black older guy who smoked a pipe and had thick black rimmed glasses..His car was a grey maxitor--Yeah really eh...some amc product..never ever saw another like it..Well he also put the screws to Kathy--questioning her on how she was running the house...Kathy was feeling the heat...She jumped on her chance to gain back her throne at every turn...Bob took in one of the guys who was in the system since birth..a crown ward..He felt that to throw him out into the world alone would just spell disaster..So he had a huge house.Bob lived with his girlfriend and also..he took in his mother..and now he took in this kid...I wanted to see this Sammy as I got along with him..He was like I, a victim of a dysfunctional family..not put in Kennedy house by the courts..he also saved me from being assaulted by a bunch of guys when they had a bottle of this stuff called locker room...they would exhale and then put their nose over the bottle and sniff it up...they would then stagger back and look as if they were going to pass out...I said they were nuts...sniffing fumes ..they insisted that I tried it...I said forget it...they moved in on me and were going to make me sniff it...Sammy went to get a staff and they had their bottle taken away...So anyway.....Bob said his girlfriend ok'd to me coming over to see Sammy and just get away from the home...So after a midnight shift I went to Bob's house..He thought Sammy was suppose to be home but he wasn't--he said he was baked...the plan was for me to spend time with Sammy as he had to get some sleep...I said no problem....I would just watch tv and wait for Sammy--Sammy came home and we talked...he just bought some beer he opened one and gave me one.....As I wasn't much of a drinker I nursed the beer slowly as the day marched on...Sammy had to go out and meet his girlfriend so back to the tv...Finally Bob's girlfriend came home...she was busy cleaning up and making dinner..she seemed nice...Barb one of the other Kennedy House staff was going to swing by and pickme up so they were going to have dinner early...Bob got up and asked how it was going? fine..I said . how was the time spent with Sammy I said ok.. but he had to leave to see his girlfriend..So we sit down to dinner for meatloaf...Damn I put it fist bite in my mouth and I got a migraine...My taste buds went whacky ...along with my sight...They could see I was having a problem..they said hey if you don't like it don't eat it...I said no...no its of ok...After eating half I couldn't eat anymore...I was feeling really out of it...Barb honked and I jumped in her car...I wanted quiet as anyone who suffers from migraine knows...I figure it was the spices in the meatloaf that triggered the migraine...Barb was asking my questions...as she wanted to know why I fell asleep as soon as I got in her car...I said long day....and I wasn't feeling well...I asked to pull over and puked...I got back in...and she said hey smells like alcohol...I said hey..stop smelling my puke eh!! She thought I was drinking at Bob's---and that was why I was sick...she didn't buy the migraine excuse...I insisted that I had a migraine and that was why everything tasted funny..and why I felt tired...I only had the one beer that Sammy gave me..and that was earlier in the day....but I couldn't tell Barb that...Well she passed on the information to Kathy and Kathy fired Bob...saying that he aided in contributing to a minor by giving me alcohol...I said this was not the case.. I had a migraine brought on by the spices in the meatloaf.....Since at the time there was no union and he faced criminal charges if he didn't accept his dismissal...He agreed to leave....He assured me that it had nothing to do with me..as this was what Kathy was waiting for and jumped on anything that could get rid of him....Bob assured me that this only delayed Kathy's future...as she was still under the microscope...and it wasn't him that she should have been worried about...

Ever heard of don't play with matches?--mini bombs

Chester sure had stories, he said that he was admitted to Kennedy house due to his mom being on special investigations and was deep in Africa under covering terrorists. He told one story of how his mom made a bomb out of model paint bottle and matches.....Yeah right we all laughed as we played risk---of course he had his armies all in Africa--he said really you could make a bomb out of match heads. So risk game abandoned we all pooled our matches together--hmmm our resident bomb specialist-Chester said not enough matches--so he said he would just make the wick...so he gathered up the materials needed to make the wick--wax paper---aluminum foil--and lastly our matches....he took a knife and deheaded all the matches--then chopped them up..Till they were a fine powder--laid them out on the piece of wax paper and then wrapped them up..then again wrapped them up using the aluminum foil...The staff watched also as like me thinking Chester was going to be caught in this tale. We all went outside and he lit the wick.....whoosssh--damn it worked.....yup you guessed it......We headed off to the store and bought a whole pack of matches must have been 50 matches in the package--and then bought a bottle of model paint...dumped the paint out..and washed the bottle out..dried it and then everyone got to work on the match heads...Chester made another fuse, and put a hole in the top of the model paint bottle...then packed the matches powder tightly around the fuse..we went outside and stood back .....booooom!!!--damn thing exploded with so much force that it blew the bottle into thousands of pieces--the lid was never found the only thing left was a dark patch were the bottle once stood..Shit good thing we all were behind the garage when it went off...Well Chester's creditability was knocked up to the top....maybe his mom was undercover in Africa afterall............

Drugs ..beer ...hard stuff..guns.

For a home for boys you would think that we would be the cleanest place with no drugs, beer, liquor or guns...well the opposite was true...Every weekend we would hit the liquor store and if we couldn't get in...we head out to the beer store...and then ask someone to get it for us...For some reason..no one would get us liquor..most likely because it was run by the government and it had that official presence...but of all the people we asked no one would get us liquor....The beer store was easy...like I said one in ten would get us the beer ...Sometime we would drink it in the stairwell of the apartment building...but most of the time we just brought it home...we would keep the staff busy while someone just walked up the stairs with it...Once and awhile by accident we got caught....we got lax because it was just too easy...we stopped having look outs ..and had the music too loud..one staff walked in and couldn't believe it...we were sitting around and drinking beer..he closed the door and we all broke up laughing..oops busted...they keep on drinking now.... they were guzzling the beer down......the staff went and got the other staff and the ran in and told everyone to put their beer down...one guy said yeah right..and opened another...they had to pull it away from him as if it was a baby's bottle he wouldn't give it up. I usually didn't drink as One sip and I was toasted...but hung around the alcoholics..

Gary

Gary was one of the tough guys...he was big and funny thing was he spoke in a whisper as if he had to hoc a lung plug but it got stuck in his throat and he couldn't clear it...He got into a fight and something broke...Edward was having a board meeting in the garage that night and one of the staff ran over to get help as they couldn't break up the fight...You could feel Ed's presence before he even came into the house....a strange calm came over everyone ---the same quiet and stillness as you feel when a storm is approaching.....He bursted into the livingroom....and everyone hugged the walls....Ed went up to Gary ....You a tough guy....motioning towards the kid....No man...No man..as Gary hugged the wall further...putting his hand up trying to fend of a punch we all felt was to follow...Edward looked around at everyone watching him...he straightened up and went into his this is all for you guys speech...when you break something here..you are breaking part of your home...your house...we are all here for you guys...Man I never seen Ed have so much passion ---to bad he only felt this ..or expressed himself so intently for anyone hurting the home...but not having the same passion as someone hurting his charges...

Well with that..the next night Gary and a couple of us were heading off to the beer store...He tried to get in but the guy tagged him and asked him for ID..Gary said no problem.. left it in the car..be back later...so we then had to go to plan B..We asked anyone who was heading to the beer store if they wanted to make an easy 5 dollars....this was no big deal as out of 10 people we asked we got one....I have wondered since then whatever made people take the chance and buy us kids beer...what was funny was of all the different times we stood outside and asked we didn't have to wait long for someone to take us up on the Quick 5 dollars..hell sometimes the people would say don't worry about the 5 bucks...gee thanks...we would all say...and afterwards talk about the cool guy who turned down the $5 bucks....well anyway...on this night this guy says sure no problem...we give him the money for the beer plus the $5 bucks....we are watching as the 12 rolls down the rollers..and then horrified as the guy opens the 12 and takes out 2 beers and stuffs one each into his pocket then marches out of the store..he say here you go...I helped myself....we all started to question him...and he says hey...look you got your beer --what are you going to do call the cops because I ripped you off....and with that he turned and walked away laughing....Damn this guy didn't know who he was ripping off...we were not the average bunch of neighborhood kids....Gary was the first to react...he went up to the guy gave him 3 sharp blows in the back of the head.....another guy was reaching in and grabbing a bottle to smack the guy with...the guy must have sensed the situation was not over and without missing a beat he reached into his pockets and put the two beers on the ground and then put the $5 dollars under one of the beers and didn't turn back....he just kept on walking...We were all so surprized at the quick turn of events that we all broke up laughing...and with that we drank our beer and headed home..

Tyrone

Tyrone was a very loud kid...He was a ladies man...always on the phone talking to the girls...You would come in the house and the kids phone was under the stairs by the front door and while on the phone he would say...Hey...Hey...Enda really likes you...Enda? Enda who...He would then blurt out ENDA.........ENDA OF MY DICK...and he would laugh and laugh..he would tell ya the same joke and laugh just as hard as if it was the first time he told ya it....He was one of the kids invited over to Carol's house for Christmas dinner as he had no where to go. Carol was the secretary for Kennedy House who took a liking to all the boys at the home....She called me her 3rd child...and addressed herself as my second mom...She took Ty in as she felt that the boys should be in a family atmosphere for Christmas dinner....but poor Tyrone...he had a problem...while there..Carol's kids who were younger ,showed Tyrone their room...and Ty found their piggy bank...yup you guessed it he took the money..robbed the little kids of their birthday and christmas money. Gamblin the older black kid in Kennedy House smacked him and handed down the same type of Speech as Hector gave to the guy in the store when I was out with him as we witnessed a black guy stealing, and most likely Gamblin got the speech also from Hector as he also stoled Lloyds stereo...so Gamblin was passing down the same lesson maybe with a little too much force...He yelled at Ty, as he told him how he let himselft down and just proved what the white man said that all niggers were thieves...he had a responsibilty to show the world that he was just as good as any person...even better as He was Black...he told Tyrone that when he did anything to make himself look bad..he also made his brothers look bad too...Tyrone paid back the money over time...And as far as I knew didn't steal anything else..well as long as Gamblin was around anyway..I ran into Tyrone one day...a couple of years after...I gave him a ride home to his basement apartment..He asked me if he could borrow a $100.00 to help cover his upcoming rent..as he was a little short..I said sure..and he said that he would get paid next week and I could expect the money then...I called Ty the following week and he asked if I could wait til the following week........hmm...well I said that was it..no more ....as I recalled years earlier how he ripped off Carol's kids. But after another week...he finally said he had the money...I drove to his basement apartment and he was ready for bed...he had this stocking over his head...hmm. whats up..he said with what...he said that he put the stocking over his head and then used his pick to poke his hair through it...and with that he started pulling poking his hair through the nylon stocking...I asked him does all blacks do that...he said oh yeah..his gradma ma use to do it to him all the time...he started to talk about his family and how lonely he was...he climbed into bed while he was talking and asked me to stay til he fell asleep....I stayed there for 20 minutes til he was quiet...and then walked slowly and quietly out the door...Damn poor kid...Why the hell did Kennedy House just dump the kids out without support....

Barb

Barb another staff member..what can you say about Barb....she drove a pacer--well ok enough said eh...lol. Barb was a big girl..hey not as hefty as Kathy....She met a guy and they were going to get married...but as fate would have it..he died as he tried to pass a big truck on a winters day way up north..Barb came back to work at the house afterwards...but she couldn't do it anymore....so she left...I wonder how she has got along since then....

Edward--The last thing I do before cashing in chips--

It was a rough time I was going through. I was trying to sort out in my mind why are I behaving this way...and then as I was staring in deep thought...the whole incident of John on top of me came rushing back....damn.. I thought...so this is a repressed memory...I throw the cup of tea I had against the wall...swearing..with all my might I screamed GET OFF OF ME YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!..well Bobby a couple of years too late..why didn't you say that back then...? Wow more shame and guilt.... I have this whole abuse situation running through my mind while I try to carry on in the real world--For a time I can balance it out stopping the abnormal experiences while I have to tune into the real world to make an adjustment in my work--after awhile It became harder --and harder til- eventually the past was taking over. I started again doing my invisible act.afraid to look anyone in the eye as they might somehow know and see my shame..this time no one around to remind me how asurd I looked. I fell into a pit of depression--I couldn't eat...I never lost my baby fat...until now...I lost so much weight that I could stand straight and look down and see my feet. My body started to do weird things also.. I smelt formaldehyde all the time...I think it was my body breaking down the protein in my muscles to try and keep everything running...Well time to cash in my chips...I couldn't take it anymore...Once the decision was made things started to get better...all I had to do was tie up loose ends...and then do the deed...I started to give away my stuff....everyone who received the goods seemed happy..One last thing to do...I decided to tell Edward about the abuse in Kennedy house...I was worried that someone else would have to go through the mental and emotional pain as I did...I called Edward at the home and he was happy to see me...We went out to lunch ...I was going to take my car as I wanted to tell him then be able to sneak off in my own vehicle as I wanted to avoid the silence that sure was to follow driving back to the home., but Edward insisted that we take his car...Hey what the hell.......eh...So we did all the what have you been doing stuff....then we got down to what was on my mind...I started telling him that I was abused at the home...and just like when I borrowed his bike and hit the car...he really didn't want to hear the details....He said that we all had our burdens in life to carry.....He decided to one up me on how he had to shuffle through life with seeing his best friend killed at Kennedy road house while driving a tractor and it rolled over on him ..killing him instantly...Damn if I didn't start to feel sorry for Edward...He said that even though I might have gone through some tough times...they didn't come close to his woe as me story....did it...he asked.....I stumbled trying to tell him that my incident was hard on me as well...the image of the movie "JAWS" came to mind as they all started to show their scars and try to one up everyone on who had the worst scar....Edward took the winds out of my sails....He said you all heath...you are on your own...have a job..car...bank account..and you are not in jail...so as he saw it I, was doing pretty good..sure I might have one or two issues that crossed the line..don't blow the what happened out of control....he urged...as he also has his own baggage but life goes on...We drove back to the house...I shook his hand...and said goodbye....damn he didn't hear a word I said...That part bugged me...and even worse the people involved were not going to answer for their wrong doings....

Colleen the southern bell

Came home from school and saw a new car in the driveway..a red mgb..the car was so tiny and unique..the top was down allowing view into the interior..was that leather seats..and it had no back seat..wow what a sleek automobile..but their was more to this car the owner. I sprinted into the house eager to share with anyone about the find in the driveway, when I entered the kitchen and everyone was around this beautiful woman..needless to say I forgot about the car...I stood in awe as she spoke you could close your eyes and you felt like you were drifty on a cloud listening to her sweet southern accent, words and phrases like ..Well I do declare flowed out like sweet sunshine, on anyone else you would have thought it idiotic but when Colleen said it ...well it just seemed right. Double bonus as you opened your eyes and there she was long blond hair, California tan, and a pink sweater that held the biggest set of sweet breasts I ever seen, they were so big but like her voice they seemed just right...the cleavage would heave sweetly as she spoke --damn someone pinch me..is this a dream. Moving up to her neck was a pink Kerchief that I learned later she used to tie around her head as she drove her mgb we called them Hickey hiders, but I don't anyone would want to leave a bruise on this sweet peach. Wow EDWARD its about time you started hiring some good looking chicks...Unfortunately she was just passing through doing her College student placement. No one of the guys gave her any problems....(see Ed all you had to do was fill the house up with these cuties and you wouldn't have had the problems you did with your staff.) Time seemed to float buy when she was on...you actually looked forward to a staff shift change...there was this one time when she did pull me close...past the "no touch policy" implemented just for her..One eveing I was in the tv room and Colleen was In the staff office filling out the shift journal when a kid came running down the stairs yelling fight ...fight! He ran past me and into the kitchen..., the kid then ran back up stairs faster then he did coming down as if he would miss all the action in the attic....I went back to the tv room--seen and been in enough of those wasn't interested...just as I was about to sit down..Colleen was pulling on my shirt....I looked around and she said in her sweetest voice...she pleaded me to come upstairs with her...as she was scared...well didn't my balls grow ten fold...sure I said....I felt like a Knight going into battle with my princess on my arm....Well anyway we climbed up the stairs and she stopped before climbing the stairs to the attic...they were fighting alright..bang...boom..boop...f u you fing son of a bitch....she looked to me...you are coming up with me right..shaking her head as she answered for me....She slowly went up the stairs peering over the landing to catch a glimpse being ready for anything..she grabbed my shirt and pulled my right up to her butt..while her other hand grabbed the railing..she was choking me with my own shirt..but I had my face smushed right into her butt....hmmm, I could smell the sweetness, how could anyone smell this good...I bet my butt didn't offer this sent..I don't think anyone else's butt could...damn she was strong..I think I was nearing pass out as I had to grab her hand to loosen her grip on my shirt--she immediately grabbed my hand and hand in hand we reached the landing...she opened the door...and put my our hands behind her butt hiding the fact that she was holding my hand..my hand being squeezed of all the blood ...but hey it was on her butt again...take the good with the bad...With the door being open...the guys saw her and they stopped fighting..and started to yell out their stories he started ...no he did...they exchanged back and forth...they talked it out..and found out that any other guy took the guys shirt because he didn't have enough clothes to do a wash..(you couldn't just wash one shirt or one pair of pants--you had to have a full load--)so he just grabbed that guys clothes in his dirty clothes hamper to make a full load...oh..everyone breathed in unison..all was calm...Colleen and I went back downstairs...still clamping my hand...she got down the attic stairs and stopped ...she leaned against the wall...and to get her breath..she started to fan her face...trying to rush the air down into her lungs...her cleavage was pulsing up and down in erratic spasms..damn what a sight I thought...she finally caught her breath...Well I do declare, I am just plum tucker out...my heart is beating a mile a minute...........well it is..she added as if she thought I said it wasn't --she lifted my hand and put it up to her breast and said feel it beating....damn I all I could feel is her plump firm breaths as and her nipples piercing through her tight sweater from all the excitement...the only pulse I could feel was from my own member in my pants throbbing....I said no I can't feel your heart...she said in a huff...as if I just had to feel her heart ...she lifted her perky breast out of the way..and then placed my hand under it....damn well I did feel it.....it was beating a mile a minute just like she said...With that she let my hand go and we went back downstairs..she said I better write this up...and I went back to watching tv...Wow another adventure in Kennedy house the fun never stops.....After that I think the fight shook her up more then I thought as she decided to head out back home again...back to Georgia....Thanks for stopping by..and I could picture "the Beverly hillbillies show" as they are all out on the porch waving goodbye..we too were on the porch...Waving as she drove away...someone did the Uncle Jed line..."you all come back now ...Yaw hear..........................".

The Prejudice Black Lab

Well everyone old age home has one--a pet. So someone came up with idea to get a dog...a nice jet black lab..This dog had spirit it was all over the place..running around chasing leaves..loving all the attention from all the guys...yeah it was a good Idea..They even said they were going to do this right...they wanted to name the dog..so they asked everyone to come up with a name...and then everyone would vote on what to name the dog...Some names were expected and rejected right from the get go...they tried again..this time they said all names except swear words or female/male body parts...So there was normal names like Jet..and Blacky...others too...but the name that the majority voted on was tokey...WTF eh! I said come on..lets name it a normal dog name not anything to do with drugs...Well I was shouted down..and tokey stuck...What a funny dog..For some reason Hector demanded the dog be locked downstairs when he came in...I don't know if the dog didn't like him or Hector didn't like the dog....but as you know we lived right beside the High school so when all the kids where going to school ..tokey would be tied up in the front yard..and strain his leash whenever a black student walked by...the damn dog was barking and spitting..growling his teeth...One of the guys said a black dog thats hates black people..we had a mini debate wondering if that could be classified as being prejudice....all concluded that the dog was whacked..yup he fits in here just fine..as tokey was choking himself on his leash trying to sink his teeth into another black student walking by...Well needless to say tokey was tied up at the back ...but all he did was bark at the kids getting on and off the buses...One weekend one of the staff who had a yellow volkswagon bug...had to go up north to the winter races ...he was the guy in the sidecar on a motor bike..so since the only way to get to go.since he was scheduled to work....twoHe said that all guys that didn't have home visits that Saturday would drive up north with him so he could race...It was just three of us going...Me and Sammy and another guy...and yup couldn't leave tokey alone so he also made the trip with us....I got in..and after a hour on the road...tokey was going ape as this being his first long car trip...I was tried of getting stepped on..so I notice that the bug did have a little divider it was empty..I went back there..hey tight fit but ...I could read my book now without the pages getting slobbered on...So Sammy was now alone with tokey...he started to pet tokey and the dog seemed to settle down...After what seemed like forever we arrived at the race track....Sammy went to get out and he put his hand on the seat to brace himself so he could push himself out of the back seat of the vw-bug and his hand slipped...whoosh...all the way up to his elbow ...it was covered in white slim...I said Sammy what the hell is that gunk....he said he didn't know...Now the staff guy was getting pissed because he wanted to get to see his bike...and side car so he was telling everyone to hurry up and get out of the car....Tokey had his eyes down..and was whinnying....I looked at the dog and then at Sammy and then at tokey...I said hey Sammy what the hell where you doing to the dog?--did you whack off our pet dog in the back seat ..? No Sammy said still laughing with this sperm still dropping from his forearm...the dog must have liked the petting behind the ears..or something...I said yeah right...whatever eh...Sammy said you every tell anyone about this and I will flatten you ...do you got..it!! I laughed ...who the hell would ever believe it anyway...I found a shirt I was lying on and tossed it down on the seat and Sammy wiped it up...don't throw it back there..put it on the floor..I don't want to lie on that all the way home...So the guy does his race and of course he doesn't win..he says he had engine problems...and couldn't make the other races..so he said might as well get going....he had grease on his face from working on the bike....so as he was holding the seat for Sammy and me to get in the back..he picked up the old shirt and wiped his face...shit it happened way too fast ...I said don't use that...too late..he said why....I said ahh.. never mind...as Sammy elbowed me in the ribs...we got in and I went in the very back again...I said to Sammy don't pet the dog so hard this time ..ok..he likes it too much...lol--Sammy turns around and starts laughing too..I guess I am not going to be able to forget this car trip eh...Tokey ignored us and rolled over and fell asleep...yup at least he was a true male dog..

Hector--

I have never had any contact with a black person before...the only information on them was--not good. So I was surprised when I met Hector...He worked the night shift.......Since I fall asleep early--He started at 11pm, and would be gone by the time everyone woke up at 7am...So the only time I ever got to know him was on the weekends...He was a quite guy...skinny and his skin and hair was shiny like it was oiled..We passed each other through the door way and his hand touched mine...I said hey watch it....his hand was all oily..as I wiped it on my pants...the oil smelt like those packs of dried leaves stuff you see in some bathrooms....yuk...I said out loud...now some of the guys were getting in on this and started to say hey look where Hector was sitting there is a oil stain on the couch from his hair...and on they made fun of him...Everyone was playing risk and so we were all seated at the table and my chair was to the back of the office..All the sudden Hectors hand appeared with a butter knife with a big hunk of margin on it. He held it in front of my face not moving...everyone stopped playing and watched the show...I asked him what was he doing...he said nothing...thought maybe you could use some oil on your skin as it looked dry....hmm, ok Hector whatever....I said you had your fun .....now please let us carryon playing risk...He just stood over me with the hunk of margin moving closer to my face....I said if that touches me.....just then he mushed the margin into my face....I jumped up and grabbed him....damn he was slick...I couldn't even hold him...I held his arm and my hand slipped off of him....So I went to the bathroom and cleaned the margin off my face...the risk game was over as in the pushing match the table got knocked and all the risk pieces got knocked....game over..After that Hector started to wake me up for school with a glass of water...not everday just once and awhile...I made a hammer at school in machine shop and named it my bk hammer..as soon as he started to come close to me ...I would swing this hammer wildly...I said if he walked into its path way its his fault--not mine..if he gets hit...Hector bought a cool 60's van with shag carpeting and everything..even a bed in the back....he had to go get some milk at the store...so he asked if I wanted to go for a ride ...I said sure...We went into the store...and hector saw a black guy stealing a can of food ...He said hey man...don't steal man..It reflects not only on him..and his character but also all blacks everywhere....the guy said sorry..but he was hungry..Hector said to get a job...but here is 20 dollars in the mean time....Wow cool maybe Hector wasn't that bad after all.....after that he didn't wake me up with water thrown on me...and my hammer sucked anyway....I tossed it out.....Later Hector let me practice driving with his car....even after I took a chrome molding off a car as I was trying to park...he still let me drive his car..Hector even tried to help me get a job at radio shack as he knew I had a knack for electronics...but the guy said that I was too young... Hector tried to pass this same type of Black pride down to a black guy that just arrived at the house....only after Gamblin saw LLoyds stereo system and walked out the door with it....wires trailing 3 feet behind as he tried to run with the stereo. One guy passed him on the sidewalk who happened to be LLoyds roommate..and came in the house and asked why the new kid Gamblin was walking down the street with LLoyds stereo.....but by that time Gamblin had already fenced the unit....He must have had a cat waiting around the corner...Gamblin came back in...and one of the staff asked him where LLoyd's stereo was...The kid who saw him also was there repeating how he saw Gamblin carrying the stereo down the street and had even offered to help Gamblin with it by picking up the speaker wires that were dragging....BUSTED...Well Hector talked with Gamblin and talked about Black pride and how to rise above the stereotype of how all blacks steal...and what he does in life affects not only him ...but his family. his friends and his race....I not sure how Gamblin got the money back or maybe Hector fronted him the money..but Lloyd had a brand new better system out of the deal...and Hector got Gamblin a job cleaning office furniture at night....In no time Gamblin also bought a stereo system as good as LLoyds with huge speakers...that is how everyone in the house got introduced to Bob Marley.....yeah man we jamming ..hope your like jamming tooo........:)
If I couldn't sleep I would go downstairs and Hector would be talking on the phone...so I made myself a tea..and sat down at the kitchen table....after 5 minutes Hector was holding the mouth piece and whispering he would like me to go up and do a head count....so he passes me the flashlight....I open the the second bedroom door and there is Tony on the floor..leaning against the bed...at first I thought he was doing his prayers or ...yup ...got the wrist action....he was whacking off...and was going lifting the mattress up ready to deposit it there...ah..shit..sorry I said and let the door close..I mean what else can you say...Hector was off the phone...and he said you couldn't have checked all the rooms...I said no I didn't ..and told him what I saw...he laughs..didn't you knock on the door before opening it...I said no....I would have thought at 1am everyone would be alseep...Hector laughs..as he grabs the flashlight and goes up to do a head check...

quality time with Kathy--ahh yeah right

Saturday sleep in...yay!! Got up and was going to jump in the shower..but had to have a coffee and smoke first...Made a coffee and went in the tv room to light up.9yup back in those days you would think that underage kids wouldn't be allowed to smoke in the house)...Turned on the tv and got lost in some program...Kathy came into the tv room and sat down ...strange..in all the years I have been here she has never sat down and watched tv....I felt the weight of someone staring at me....I turned my head slightly and saw Kathy staring at my open house coat as I had put my feet up...I quickly re-adjusted my house coat and returned her stare.....she embarrassed at being caught...yelled that I shouldn't sit around all day in my house coat...I said really eh...who never know who might try to look up it eh...as I butted my smoke and headed upstairs to finish showering...I felt dirty .......that the bitch was spying on my wardrobe failure...yuk as I tried to wash away the image of Kathy staring at my crotch....

knife to the throat

It was an assembly at school--this was rare at West Hill C.I...so I attended with my school friend Odas who btw made his dream come true and is now on the opp police force. WE were seated in the school auditorium waiting for everthing to start...along came Lloyd from the home...he was with a friend of his....it felt strange to have another guy from the house attend my school as most of the guys went to the trade high schools, but Lloyd had the grades to attend West Hill CI. They sat directly behind us...He was acting like an idiot...I asked him what was up>? he said hey did I say you could talk to me...? With that he produced a kitchen knife from the home...a sharp big blade knife...he pressed the blade against my throat....He said that I was to do anything he said and if I disobeyed him he would kill me....yay whatever...why don't you stop talking about it and just do it --you chicken shit...he laughed and pressed the blade further in...I could feel the blade start to cut into my skin..he held the knife there for what seemed like forever...Odas said hey man be cool eh...what did he do to you...lets all stay cool ...why don't you put the knife away and we can talk this over....Lloyd told me to shut the asshole up...I again asked him why he was doing this....he said because he can....and fear him because he owned me...more people started to be seated and the hole that was around us started to fill in..We all started to feel the silent hush as more and more people realized that Lloyd had a knife to my throat...this caused Lloyd to back off.....he put the knife back into his note books and left with his friend clapping him on the back as if congratulating his on doing a good deed....Odus said ok ...lets go...go...go where?> he said you have to report this...I said no the guy was just letting off steam....most likely the house got to him..and he fell apart...this was his way of screaming out for help...Odus said ok lets get him some help..he said no matter what I told him he was going to report this to the principle....We went to the office and asked to speak to the principle..The secretary said that he was busy...We told her what happened she disappeared and we were ushered into his office...Odas told him what happened...and the principle came over and looked at the marks on my throat...he said ok he would take care of this....that day we heard that the police raided his locker finding a knife...they took Lloyd away in handcuffs..I went home after school and Kathy said well you did it again didn't you....I said what do you mean...she said the police were here and asked how Lloyd got hold of the knife....now she this was going to make like she wasn't doing her job correctly...I said yeah and so whats the problem...she started to shrill now and said well just so you know ...That was the last straw for Lloyd..he was now in serious trouble and I ruined his life...they took him away to jail....She wanted to know why I aired our dirty laundry to the principle..if I had of told her she could have taken the knife away and sat down with Lloyd and talk it out....I said that he did it front of another student...it was that student that insisted that we had to inform the principle...She said shaking her head that Lloyd is now moved out..and his education and future are history...... way to go Bobby!!

17 and time to move out....

I am in grade 12 and exams are just around the corner...the stress of living in this hostile house is weighing down on me...I think I have been through alot in this 4 and half years that I called this house home..Instead of building young boys into confident responsible men...the goal seems to be how to beat the soul and spirit out of these young bucks....How many guys that have gone through Kennedy house's doors have made it....Ok make it easier how many have stayed out of jail..? Not many. Still the world revolves around money..so Ed was not going to be pulling in any more money from the children's aid for anyone who is over 18..so out they go..and to make sure they are out and he doesn't have to carry them ...he gives ya the boot before your 18 birthday. So like I said with exams around the corner...I was told to look for an apartment....I said how was I to pay the rent? Kathy said that I would be given student welfare..Till I finished grade 12...I said what about after that...She said as far as going on to further my education...she didn't see that as an option...best that once I finished school to look for a job..Immediately. I asked about the 25% of my pay she has socked away when do I receive that...she said sorry but that money went back into the house..but I said that when we were told to give her 25%of our pay when we were forced to work the summer and also whenever I worked --hell they even took Tyrones 25% when he slaved all day selling dicky dee ice cream it would be returned to us upon leaving the house so of like a hope chest--funds to sock away for a rainy day..She went into do you know how much it costs to keep me here....She said that I would find out once I was on my own.At this point we we in the little house office...it was the 0pening to the old stairwell to the attic...but they blocked it up when they took out the stairs..the same stairs that a worker 4 years before fell through when they were fixing up the attic..he fell through and his feet were dangling.good thing his crotch stopped the fail...ouch.as I recalled that day..I was brought back to Kathy blabbing about how the funding worked and how the hell do you think they paid for the movies at the bijou..Just then YUK..she let one go...I said what the hell man..She wasn't embarrassed as Kathy told me what do you think woman don't fart ...I said I know woman do , but maybe she just felt that she didn't think of me as anyone important and did it to emphize her disrespect she had for me as she didn't say oops or sorry or pardon me.What she said next seemed to backed it up..She also said that once I left I was to call first...as she didn't see any reason why I would drop by she said someone would greet you at the front door and I would have to have a good reason to enter the home...as she couldn't think of any she said once I moved out it was time to say goodbye and good luck..The next day a newspaper was purchased and I was to go through the want ads looking for a new place to live....I checked out a couple of places...but they were all dives..or filled with party people ...one place you could even smell the weed....Finally found a shared condo....price was right and they even said that I could use the mattress on the floor if I wanted...it was all set the move out was to began as soon as possible.....no going away parties...no visit from ED....nothing---here's your hat.........It was really lonely being dumped like that....the condo was quiet....to quiet....I couldn't sleep...I had to study for my exams....I had to stay focused and also had to look for a job....I did ok on my exams....I passed grade 12.....I even won the Canadian Manufactures Award --I still wonder why I was told that it was not an option to carry on with my education...as afact that I passed grade 12 with honors and even won an award too..why didn't I qualify to carry on with my education? I had high hopes of going to college or University ...Shit what do I do now? Rent has to be paid....I wondered how I was to do that I had to find a job....but quick that was for sure....I needed new clothes as I was starting to lose weight...well shit I didn't even know how to turn the stove on....no wonder I was losing weight...I called my sister and she said that I needed help and I would have to call social services and get Welfare...So I called social services and a nice worker came over...I said that I need to get some clothes and bus fare...and rent money....Till I found a job...I told Her That I figured maybe 2 months...she said sure no problem....I said how long do I have Till I had to pay back the money....she laughed and said hey thats cute....she said that I didn't have to pay back the government. Strange I thought hell --why would anyone want to get off it if you didn't have to pay it back (to this day I still ask this question)......I said ok.....So I got my cheque and bought a new pair of safety boots because everyone was saying that I would need them.....And a bus pass as it was cheaper in the long run instead of tickets....I found a job...I got the welfare check for the second month and called my welfare social worker and said that I haven't cashed it ......so should I send it back..so laughed again and said no....go out and buy your some new clothes for my job....and have some lunch money....I thanked her for helping me...

Return from Manitoba---

After boarding the plane home....I was so thankful for meeting Sue and her family especially her father who knew how to handle scum like Ted my Carnival restaurant boss....so on my way back to Toronto..yeah...it felt good to be going home..the carnival life was not for me..getting drunk every night...working your ass off for a loud mouth piece of shit....for peanuts..although I did wonder how many of the guys visited the girl in the costume jewelry tent..The only good part was meeting Sue and her family...So one the way home...I sat in the middle of the plane...no one was in my row....or the row across but the rest of the plane was full....they started to serve dinner....they started at the front and back..and worked their way to the middle to me....well the person serving the back rows thought the person who served the front was looking after me and the person who served the front thought the person who served the back was looking after me......or maybe I had to pay extra for food.....I smelt all the different foods my stomach started to rumble...I even would have settle for one of Ted greasy burgers or for Gamblin's soup..Gamblin helped the cooks in the front out...he also cooked the meals for the staff...soup was always brewing...Ted said that we should eat lots of soup--and stew...yeah all the left overs that they didn't sell they put in the soup..they got Gamblin to work in the back because on the first day it was explained to us that a paying customer didn't want a black person to touch their food....Well not only was Ted a piece of Shit he was also a racist...Anyway all that was behind me now ...going home...as my stomach screamed out for food......They were now clearing the trays...Well that does it I am not going to get anything...I asked one of the woman clearing up --How much was the tray of food....she looked at me and asked why...I said I didn't receive one...she talked to the other girls and one at a time they all started to wait on me....oh .... man so much food that they opened up the seat beside me and put the additional tray down... it was how I first thought ..one thought each other was looking after me....well now I was stuffed and it was night time flying in to Toronto..we had to circle around the cn tower twice....what a view...it was perfect...We landed ..and I made my way to the phones...I called the home and no answer...what the hell eh..>? So I called Carol's house the secretary to the group home and also my friend.I babysat ..her kids. Butch--answered(her husband)..I briefly explained to him what happened and how there was no answer at the home... he said they were closed down as the kids were at camp....so I asked him what do you think I should do.....he said if I wanted to he could come pick me up....I thought he just got off of work and would be tired...so I said I would just grab a room around here and bus it back tomorrow....I saw the price of the hotels ...they even came to the airport to pick you up.well for the price I guess so....hell its almost 2pm..I was usually drunk by this time in Manitoba...I was wide awake still...I thought I would save the money and just sleep in a chair at the airport and wait till the bus started. I didn't sleep to well...who could...ever slept in one of those plastic chairs?---anyway I caught the bus and headed to Scarborough...I went to the house and sure enough all locked up...I went over to Butch's house.. he said that he was also heading out and that maybe I should go up with them to the trailer where Carol and their kids were....I said ok...so away we go...wasn't much company going up- as I slept most of the time....Spent a couple of days up there....Butch still made the commute into the city to go to work...he said that he got a call from Kathy and that she was back at the house ,and I should get back home asap..So Butch told her when she could expect me back...the following day and what time..as he would drop me off before he went into work....I arrived home to see a guy parked in the school parking entrance and going through this huge mound of garbage....Strange that antique radio looked just like mine....I entered the home..damn it felt good to be home Kathy quickly killed that good feeling. So Kathy said what the hell happened ...I told her all about Ted and how he was a racist piece of shit and worked us to death and then left us alone knowing that we all were drinking and up all night .She said that Ted did the house a favor by taking the kids for the summer saving the house money.. and giving the kids a chance to see Canada...I said you make it sound like a holiday...he doesn't give a shit about us...he just wants cheap labor...She said don't think you will be just sitting around here...you will have to work..you can start by painting your room...She said you don't have to thank her for getting started on cleaning things up....yeah ok..whatever that means...so I go up to my room and all of my stuff is gone....that little bitch...she threw out all of my stuff.....that was my radio that guy was putting into his car.....I went into the room that over looked the front..and could see that most of my stuff was gone and also the car in the school lot gone too....damn...that bitch...she is so cold hearted ...I felt the tear well up ...I thought I can't give her the satisfaction of seeing how much she hurt me....I went down and asked her why she is trying to erase me....she said why did I not make the vacation with Ted work.?...I spoiled it by coming home..and now she had to stay and babysat me..and to bust her budget and bring a shift in to look after me....she said I ruined everything...how does it feel to have my stuff ruined....the same way I ruined her schedule and budget.?....She said why don't you go out into the garbage and get your tape decks and electrical stuff....and tools...I said that someone had already stopped by the side of the road and took them...I left to go up to my room....she said she put the nice antique radio on top of the crap...did they take that also.?....bitch.....damn a frigging tear gave me away as I slowly said yup that was the first to go....oh well...she noticed the tear...she smirked baiting me further.I didn't bite...I walked away...it was up in my room that I felt the full blow of her intent......yup make no mistake I was home....Welcome back to hell..........

Doug asst exe. director--yeah the knuckle on head guy

I was once again confronted with Doug. He was chosen to break the news to me about a death in my family..My aunt passed away...He came over from the garage office and asked that I accompany him downstairs ..he wanted to chat with me where we could have some privacy...He told me about my aunt....I couldn't believe it....I started to cry and Doug reached over and put his arm around me and pulled me across his lap.....What the hell man....this is too much comforting...he stoked my hair as I finished off my emotional grief at hearing the news...I tried to pull my self away to sit up and his hand pushed my head back down into his lap....wtf....I then thought I should ask him questions...and sat up to hear the answers....that worked...when was the funeral etc....He said he would drive me to my grandmothers...I got cleaned up and met him outside....WE drove to the junction in Toronto...I stared out the window thinking about my aunt....and how she always had ice cream in her freezer whenever I visited her little apartment...A tear streamed down...well that was the break Doug was looking for.... he placed his hand on my knee...and then on the inside of my thigh.....stroking my leg while maintaining a firm presence on my leg.....this guy is creeping me out...as I recalled our first meeting how he knucked me in the head with such force the pain caused me to lose my breath and he 'fixed ' me ....I recalled how I felt that something was wrong with how he touched me..the very same way as he stroked the inside of my thigh......Later I found out that Doug was relieved of his duties as an assit. Exe. director as he was caught over stepping his bounds..I can only guess what he was caught doing.......AS I heard it he admitted to being a Homosexual and Edward asked for him to resign--oh yay you have to know that there was more to this ....

Tony the tooth fairy?

Tony was a slick guy that was for sure...he stuck by Kathy and said how I pushed him and he was only defending himself against me....I tripped and fell over the box..and through the window....Now Tony was having an argument with another guy...this kid was small but worked out.....I don't know what started it or what happened but knew it came in from the kitchen..where Kathy was....The small guy was getting away from Tony...he was way across the other side of the room...and Tony said I will get you ....the kid said yeah go ahead and try.....we all thought it was over...and just then Tony slide across the living room and double kicked the kid right in the face....man what the hell was that kick...I have only seen that type of move on those kung-fu movies..Even Kathy saw how Tony attacked the small guy...yeah the kid was mouthing off, but it was Tony that did the kung-fu kick....the kid held his mouth and went into the washroom....BANG...BANG....BANG...he screamed....and wailed..at the top of his lungs....water was spraying everywhere...my teeth...he spite out..with blood whistling through where his two front teeth used to be....the sink that survived over a hundred years sitting of the wall was half on the floor...with the water pissing out of a feed pipe......now it was Kathy's turn to react ..........the HOUSE...STOP RUINING THE HOUSE..JUST LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO THE SINK.....LOOK AT THIS MESS......the kid said what about my teeth.....SO WHAT... she said DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO RIP THE SINK OUT...ITS NOT GOING TO BRING BACK YOUR TEETH IS IT...as she twisted the shut offs to the sink...the water stopped pissing out...the kid wasn't caring about the sink..he was begging everyone to help look for his teeth....maybe they could put them back in.....Kathy said stop it..as the small guy was moving the couch looking for his teeth....get in the kitchen and put some ice on your mouth and stop spreading blood around the house....you have done enough damage to the house..already.....man this bitch was as cold as they come..that was for sure...someone found the teeth...they were snapped off...nope they couldn't be put back in.....the kid was now damaged for life..due to Kathy's neglect of handling another incident...as I was too....by the same kid..with her present in both incidents...who knows how she wrote this incident up....because Tony was still there at the end of the day....The small guy just got his denture plate and we were all hanging at Mcdonalds...we left and were heading home...half way home...the small guy said his teeth...he forgot his teeth on a tray in Mcdonalds...he took them out and put them in a kleenex on the try...he forgot to re-insert them after he ate.....he yelled half running come on help me look for them....he ran back to Mcdonalds...We arrived there just as Kathy was pulling up...What the hell eh?...what was she doing here...Everyone started to come out of Mcdonalds...we asked what was wrong..they said some kid was going nuts yelling for his teeth. and going through the trash...they left because the staff at Mcdonalds feared for the customers as the kid was emptying trash going out or control....he kept asking who cleared the trays and which garbage they emptied it in....the witness said that the guy started to empty garbage all over the restaurant...they must have been told to call Kathy to help go through the garbage to look for his teeth....and so I guess Kathy drove right over... everyone was clearing out of Mcdonalds...you could almost hear his screams above the traffic and voices of the crowd now outside of Mcdonalds....finally Kathy came out with the kid.....it was too much for the kid..losing his teeth the second time ....he fall to the ground and looked like he just wanted to give up......he held out his hands and screamed his teeth...his teeth....he looked right through us......Kathy said stop your wailing get into the car......you were told not to lose this set as they were very expensive...she told the kid that she didn't believe they would be able to buy another set........man talk about kicking a kid when he is down....with the cold hard truth being forced at him the poor kid thrust his hands up....as if reaching up to god to beg to be taken now.....Kathy screamed at him get in the car..you are making a scene and the police will be called and he will be charged with disturbing the peace....she half tugged and pulled and pushed the kid into the car....Kathy turned to look in our direction....you guys have caused enough trouble here...get home now...NOW I mean It ...do you hear me...NOW.. I guess she didn't want to go through the garbage either...what a bitch...